It is a universal fact
that it is near impossible to have everything. When I say everything I mean the
balance of the basic things one supposedly needs to be in possession of in life
in order to be happy.
1. Lush Job/Career
2. Amazing Friends/really good social life
3. A boy or girl who you love and who loves you back
These three just start it
off; clearly you could go off into a million tangents from these categories,
extra curricular activities, the perfect body, a decent sex life etc. I just
feel like it is so difficult to get the balance right between everything. I
would say this battle, this subject is something that I spend a lot of my time
thinking (worrying) about and talking to my friends and family about. The mind
boggles. I feel like I am just immersed in an ongoing internal debate that
comes in waves, but always move in circles, sometimes spirals. Often spirals
out of control.
For me, I have always been very lucky to have the best
friends a girl could ask for and as a result my social life has also been
second to none. I go out with friends, I stay in with friends, I have dinner
with friends and I have always lived with friends. That part of my life has
never caused me any stress or anguish, aside from when those closest to me are
suffering themselves. The flip side of this being that whenever I am worried,
hurt, distraught, hysterical, broken hearted, pissed off or stressed out I have
a lovely long list of exceptionally understanding, wise people who are just as
willing to be my shoulders to cry on as I am to them. I think it is one of the
joys of friendship. Sharing the good, the bad and the ugly; the marvelous, the heinous
and the out and out fucked up.
I started writing this blogg at the beginning of the month when I first created an account..and now that I look at it again I'm not sure where I was going with it! Probably along the lines of a massive rant about how it is so difficult to have balance in life and how so much of this pressure comes from society and the world around you. I know I am such a classic case of putting pressure on myself by constantly comparing myself to others who are more successful or better looking or thinner or prettier or more creative or whatever else than me. It so so so incredibly unhealthy and detrimental to my general well being so why do I do it? Why does the brain work in this way? Why is it so much easier to say negative things about yourself and worse still internally project negativity about yourself than it is to say positive things? It is something I really need to work on in order to gain self confidence and generally feel better about myself when I look in the mirror in the morning.
I think I need to publish this now...so that the act has actually happened and then I will be able to get into a bit of a better routine with writing and blogging and thinking and so on. Annoyingly, I have been finding it so so easy to do everything else but before i sit down at the computer to write and that is wrong!
I love to write, it makes me happy, it makes me feel like I have achieved something! Even if it is just nonsensical ramblings about feeling fat in the gym or sad about the Italian... all of it is my life and therefore all of it is worthy and important in some kind of context!
We shall see......
Thanks for reading, it truly means a lot to me :)
x
I started writing this blogg at the beginning of the month when I first created an account..and now that I look at it again I'm not sure where I was going with it! Probably along the lines of a massive rant about how it is so difficult to have balance in life and how so much of this pressure comes from society and the world around you. I know I am such a classic case of putting pressure on myself by constantly comparing myself to others who are more successful or better looking or thinner or prettier or more creative or whatever else than me. It so so so incredibly unhealthy and detrimental to my general well being so why do I do it? Why does the brain work in this way? Why is it so much easier to say negative things about yourself and worse still internally project negativity about yourself than it is to say positive things? It is something I really need to work on in order to gain self confidence and generally feel better about myself when I look in the mirror in the morning.
I think I need to publish this now...so that the act has actually happened and then I will be able to get into a bit of a better routine with writing and blogging and thinking and so on. Annoyingly, I have been finding it so so easy to do everything else but before i sit down at the computer to write and that is wrong!
I love to write, it makes me happy, it makes me feel like I have achieved something! Even if it is just nonsensical ramblings about feeling fat in the gym or sad about the Italian... all of it is my life and therefore all of it is worthy and important in some kind of context!
We shall see......
Thanks for reading, it truly means a lot to me :)
x
